Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Let the Healing Begin
I went to Venice yesterday to "go surfing," since the south-facing breaks of Malibu, Topanga, and Sunset were reported to have knee-high waves, and Venice sounded bigger. But alas, I chose the wrong place. Who cares about size when it's closed out? In fact, the bigger set waves there looked like hard-ass breaking walls of death. Is that fun? I watched from the pier as three shortboarding fools struggled to find a moment of what would later be called "pleasure." But there was simply nowhere for them to shred on their potato chips. They'd drop in optimistically and then the entire wall of death would fall down onto their little haids. It's just abusive at that point. And as I am all about loving the self in '07, I opted to stay on the pier. Dang.
This was the day after finally returning to my beloved former home break of Tourmaline, after not surfing there for a whole month. Abusive. I can't even speak about that pain right now, it's too soon. The conditions there were glassy, sunshiny & beautiful, but the surf was only 1-2 feet. I was desperate so I went in anyway, and it turned out to be relaxing. Low stakes, low pressure, easy paddling. Everything was fine until the end, when someone cut me off and crashed into my board, putting a MAJOR big gouge in my rail. My beautiful board. She was super apologetic and felt really bad, and even approached me in the parking lot, as she should have, and offered to pay for the repair. It was obvious that she hadn't done this on purpose, so I wasn't a dick about it and I let it go. But it left me wishing I was a better surfer. How stupid is it to have a destructive collision on a knee high wave? Yes, the other person cut me off bad, at the last second, but shouldn't I have been able to magically avoid it?
Figure 1:) Cartman remains in denial even as an 80-foot satellite dish springs out of his ass.
Figure 2:) Cartman breaks into song after being hypnotized by the Alien Dancing Device.
this post reminded me of Angus who was abducted at age 12 or 11 can't remember and the aliens stuck a probe up her ass and then she became obsessed with all things ass. I often wonder what happened to her. when I told this story to Sea monkey she knew exactly which aliens I was talking about, not all of them are ass-probing apparently. Sir you are a master on the waves that's just it I've seen it. There on the pacific ocean what else is there to say.
a couple of things before I go Ali when is your book of proverbs coming out?
2. We saw the First Emperor opera last night goddammit opera is crazy. Tan Dun's music was really interesting including some giant gong the size of your van. There wasn't a time when anyones singing gave me chills but when the crazy scrim goes up and you see the chorus of about 90 people singing and playing a drum for the first time it was really great. And then when in your life do you get to watch a woman have sex with a fugitive/composer and immediately gain the use of her lame legs. Things went down hill from there though but I won't tell all.
: 10:10 AM I saw Poppea and loooved it. Openly wept at the end.
Is anyone going to either of these next month???
Mahagonny- where sin is "in" and love is always on sale.
Tannhäuser- a rousing bacchanale that crescendos to a savage climax and the heaven-storming Pilgrim's Chorus.
: 3:19 PM Capt'n I sent you about 50 links for inspirash.
: 4:26 PM Links to this post:
16 Comments:
The healing began last night when they showed "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe" after the news.
Figure 1:) Cartman remains in denial even as an 80-foot satellite dish springs out of his ass.
Figure 2:) Cartman breaks into song after being hypnotized by the Alien Dancing Device.
By 
The Capt'n, at
11:51 AM
It did feel empty without Seamonkey and Dick Blue, though.
By The Capt'n, at
11:51 AM
it's all gonna be okay capt'n. Like I've heard at 12 step meetings, when god accidentally slams your finger in the car door, He takes you to In N Out afterwards and buys you an e.coli burger. Hang in there.xxo
Boy you guys really know how to make a pathetic person feel better, and just when my surf esteem was getting dangerously low. Thanks for putting it all into perspective. xo.
By The Capt'n, at
12:22 AM
capt'n, what was that you said about "some days the bear eats you...?" this too will pass, capt'n sir, you will rule the waves again a little wiser, and pee ess: better your beautiful board than your beautiful arm or leg... (knocking wood vigorously)
Thanks, slothy, you are right again as usual. How can I feel gloomy and sorry for myself when I have two arms and two legs? Jeez. I even had the gall to call seamonkey69 and leave her a series of long, crybaby messages about my board and how nervous I was going out there alone w/out her & how i still suck as a surfer. Good one! Me telling this to somebody who hasn't even been anywhere near a wave in months. Which reminds me, I had a dream last night about Seamonkey69. I showed up at her beige, and she and her clients, who in this case were prisoners, were coming in from their smoke break in the snow. I stepped outside to surprise her, just as she was contemplating driving away with a partially retarded fugitive hiding in the back of her pickup truck. She seemed very tired and she wanted to set the caged bird free. What does this mean?
By The Capt'n, at
9:07 AM
it means it's time for you two to come east for a visit.
By , at
9:40 AM
geez I don't know who that last commenter was but I think they're on to something. A perplexing dream you had capt'n Ultimately I think your dream means you're a big ol' lovey pants
this post reminded me of Angus who was abducted at age 12 or 11 can't remember and the aliens stuck a probe up her ass and then she became obsessed with all things ass. I often wonder what happened to her. when I told this story to Sea monkey she knew exactly which aliens I was talking about, not all of them are ass-probing apparently. Sir you are a master on the waves that's just it I've seen it. There on the pacific ocean what else is there to say.
a couple of things before I go Ali when is your book of proverbs coming out?
2. We saw the First Emperor opera last night goddammit opera is crazy. Tan Dun's music was really interesting including some giant gong the size of your van. There wasn't a time when anyones singing gave me chills but when the crazy scrim goes up and you see the chorus of about 90 people singing and playing a drum for the first time it was really great. And then when in your life do you get to watch a woman have sex with a fugitive/composer and immediately gain the use of her lame legs. Things went down hill from there though but I won't tell all.
By , at
10:10 AM
I wanted to see the Tan Dun but didn't get to it. The bigger the gong...I need a big gong.
I saw Poppea and loooved it. Openly wept at the end.
Is anyone going to either of these next month???
Mahagonny- where sin is "in" and love is always on sale.
Tannhäuser- a rousing bacchanale that crescendos to a savage climax and the heaven-storming Pilgrim's Chorus.
By , at
3:19 PM
SeaMonkey I couldn't respond to your workplace syllabus until now because I laughed so hard things got broked. the thing is would you consider performing Dwight D. Eisenhower's cautionary and obviously ignored speech. seeing as how I missed your GG Allen performance because I had my head in a mayonaise jar that week. Babe I confess I was the one who put MM up to pleading with you to have your workshop. No pressure but I'm almost ready to bring you an apple every week. And is there anything funnier than the P Crawdaddy talking about the land the Sea the surf the self. Why she gotta kill me every week.
Capt'n I sent you about 50 links for inspirash.
By , at
4:26 PM
gree c, without you life would be nothing. Now I'ma go check those hot links. Call me 100x.
By The Capt'n, at
8:21 PM
Sea Monkey69, watch what you say babe cause I might just show up in NY sometime soon...
By The Capt'n, at
8:24 PM
acquatic cabbage nymph, do I know you? Who are you? I mean, we openly wept at the end of Poppea too, so I feel like I know a lot about you...
By The Capt'n, at
8:26 PM
btw gree c, I don't think it was angus who was abducted by those aliens, wasn't it what's her face who you did that portrait of, Maura's g-fren? Or were they both abducted?
By The Capt'n, at
8:40 PM
Hi Guys! xoxox I love you like a sparkly gold auto body loves a turtle wax rub down. Don't cry Seamonkee, you'll be just fine, I knows it but please send out mass email right away spreading the word that you are looking for a place. what happened to Kurtains place? not that we need discuss this here but I think you'll be fine, better then fine me thinks. Also, writing workshop at Chez Mounds! Unless the One Who Will Always Be Indebted to Us is too noisy or smells the place up or something.
Yo. Belated but heartfelt happy birthday to Mandy.
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