Saturday, January 21, 2006
Dear Diarhea,
I gotta stop with the beer for a while. Even just one a night gets me bloated all over again, like before the 7-day master cleanse. But I guess I've always been a beer choad. Do people really like me? 41 is really different than 29. I think I should do an abreviated version of the cleanse like once a month, 'cause I felt really good on it. The liver and colon cleanse pills are really tearing me a new one. But in a good way. I can't believe what's coming out of my ass, something old, something new, something borrowed, and deffinitely blue. All my friends are famous, they have drive and ambition, what's wrong with me?So many things are going on, I don't know where to start.
Last night Sea Monkey and I watched Wedding Crashers another one and a half times. Our best lines right now are "Rule # 76: always follow through and play like a champion." and "yeah, you go have fun, I'm gonna go ice my balls and spit up blood. Team player." Then we waddled out the door to go to T.M.I., hosted by Anna Joy and Ali. We didn't care so much about the show, it was really to see the A's. Anna is home for 2 short days, taking a badly needed break from being the sole caregiver to her dying mom in Fresno. And Ali is still recovering from bad side effects of appendix removal surgery. I cannot believe the horror they are living right now. It's really cruel. Anyway, we only got a few blocks before getting pulled over by a cop. Broken headlight on a tattered old van filled with surfboards, on a Friday night, I guess he thought he had an easy bust. He had that nasty attitude at first like they do, and Sea Monkey got triggered for a second. Yet we stayed cool like zen masters and drove away with a just fixit ticket. After he saw that we were in fact two regular joe girls in their 40's, sober, with all the paperwork in order, he changed his tune. Of course we got to TMI too late though, after everybody was gone. Defeated but laughing, we waddled back home, back to the couch, where the Mrs. had come, after hours of rehearsal, to join us for round 3 of Wedding Crashers. Everything felt so right.
Now it's a new day, Diarhea, and me and Sea Monkey are at the pretentious cafe. They're playing a song that reminds me of Cheryl and Peggy in Amsterdam. I'm having a wave of love and missing them, a tidal wave of memories. I don't think other people are plagued with melancholic sentimentality like I am, is that why I get so stuck?
Today's plans:
1) work on "2006, the art project and science experiment,"
2) go surfing with Sea Monkey, even though it's a little breezy
3) attend Mrs. The Capt'n's concert tonight
thanks for posting about your day, i live vicariously thru your blog, wishing i was watching wedding Crashers for the 3rd time with you guys instead of breaking rocks in my stupid stupid stupid studio. Hugs to Sea Monkey.
are you out your mind
the only time I had a moment of pause is when I noticed Buster's name was absent from a list of excellent pets on this very blog but then I told myself you were probably saving him for a special list
your punishment for sillyness watch wedding crashers one more with the ladies and forget about your last post forever
make a list of the best succulents you've seen in the last 6 months and report
: 6:22 AM do I have to remind you that you were and are the first documented jewish superhero -maybe I need to make a poster or something?
everytime I'm in the basement of the Greenpoint Y in the tiny pool where they have painted over the ceramic tiles and all is just a little bit g-r-o-s-s I think of you in the setting sun swimming with dolphins and everything is much better
I can see I'm going to have to apply for another credit card and come out there
love, love and love
: 6:38 AM PS - Me would like to cleanse and purge my liver area as well. Also, is there a possibility for brain damage reversal?
PPS - Corny, many bets your studio is not so stupid. Me canst waitst to see your show.
: 6:57 AM : 6:59 AM Corny, I too wish you were on the couch with us. I'll def. post some instructions & info for the liver & plus cleanses soon.
But before that, I must know about your upcoming show imediately! What where and when? Any time around March, perchance? I want.
Gree C., I love ya man, as always, now just get over. I know I'm getting over to your studio for your birthday and for Zoe's opening so that we can consult about which paintings are finished, yet still, you should be here.
Mountain Man, why you so sweet? In the meantime, don't go changing, I love your brain damage.
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6 Comments:
Capt'n I'm interested in this 7-day master cleanse you speak of. Where does one find directions or might you sometime post a How to?
thanks for posting about your day, i live vicariously thru your blog, wishing i was watching wedding Crashers for the 3rd time with you guys instead of breaking rocks in my stupid stupid stupid studio. Hugs to Sea Monkey.
please Sea Monkey
are you out your mind
the only time I had a moment of pause is when I noticed Buster's name was absent from a list of excellent pets on this very blog but then I told myself you were probably saving him for a special list
your punishment for sillyness watch wedding crashers one more with the ladies and forget about your last post forever
make a list of the best succulents you've seen in the last 6 months and report
By , at
6:22 AM
Now Capt'n
do I have to remind you that you were and are the first documented jewish superhero -maybe I need to make a poster or something?
everytime I'm in the basement of the Greenpoint Y in the tiny pool where they have painted over the ceramic tiles and all is just a little bit g-r-o-s-s I think of you in the setting sun swimming with dolphins and everything is much better
I can see I'm going to have to apply for another credit card and come out there
love, love and love
By , at
6:38 AM
This was the best kind of post, the post that makes other people feel joy at your willingness to poke fun of self, the desire to help you feel more better about self and to say thanks for being so funny. I bet you are a rad girl capt'n, and like I always say, once a super hero, always a superhero.
PS - Me would like to cleanse and purge my liver area as well. Also, is there a possibility for brain damage reversal?
PPS - Corny, many bets your studio is not so stupid. Me canst waitst to see your show.
By , at
6:57 AM
PS - Just for the innards record, I get diarrhea all the time. Just sayin. Pleased to meet you.
By , at
6:59 AM
So many sweet comments to comment upon, I hardly know where to start! Being pathetic really seems to pay off around here. Just know that when I turn into even more of a self-obsessed whiner you'll only have yourselves to blame, my dear ones.
Corny, I too wish you were on the couch with us. I'll def. post some instructions & info for the liver & plus cleanses soon.
But before that, I must know about your upcoming show imediately! What where and when? Any time around March, perchance? I want.
Gree C., I love ya man, as always, now just get over. I know I'm getting over to your studio for your birthday and for Zoe's opening so that we can consult about which paintings are finished, yet still, you should be here.
Mountain Man, why you so sweet? In the meantime, don't go changing, I love your brain damage.
By 
The Capt'n, at
9:43 AM
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